anti-reality

been lagging on updates, need to change that. life has changed yet again. i decided to sell my car and buy a new one, which i’m probably doing today. it’s been weird sitting here with six thousand eight hundred dollars next to me in this envelope…thinking about all of the things i could possibly be doing right now rather than preparing to buy this 4runner. also, i’m going to get “Be Happy” tattooed onto my left arm..i’m so excited about it. just waiting to find a place where i’d really like to get it done. part of me kinda sorta wants to go to lucky 7 in king’s beach, but i have no idea if that would work. i’m really trying to take a trip of some sort with some of my left over money…tahoe, plane ticket, something…my heart aches. it wants to be in indiana with jill and melanie. but then again my heart also wants to be here in napa, with my dad, and in tahoe, too…ah. i’m so lost in life right now. i wish i had all of my friends here to like get my own place in tahoe with.